In the current crisis I'm still seeing clients but not face-to-face. Like many others I'm using video platforms like Zoom and Facetime and occasionally just phone. I was skeptical beforehand but the work I'm doing on Zoom has convinced me that online therapy is a perfectly feasible proposition. Though I think I'll always prefer meeting in person I feel happy to offer online sessions not just for these times but, where appropriate, as a permanent part of the way I work with both individuals and couples.
So I mean it sincerely when I say don't hesitate to contact me if you think I can be of any help at this time. I am a UKCP registered psychotherapist and Relate Certified Counsellor with 25 years experience of working with individuals, couples, supervisees and groups in NHS, voluntary sector, educational and private settings. I work with individuals, couples and groups with issues of all kinds: family, work, anger, depression, self-esteem, bereavement and personal development in general to name a few.
So I mean it sincerely when I say don't hesitate to contact me if you think I can be of any help at this time. I am a UKCP registered psychotherapist and Relate Certified Counsellor with 25 years experience of working with individuals, couples, supervisees and groups in NHS, voluntary sector, educational and private settings. I work with individuals, couples and groups with issues of all kinds: family, work, anger, depression, self-esteem, bereavement and personal development in general to name a few.
Services
Contact me and we'll arrange an initial appointment.
This half hour session is not therapy as such but an opportunity for us to meet and find out a little more about each other.
I will ask you to outline the sort of issues you might want to bring and you will be able to ask any questions you might have.
There is no obligation involved and only a 10 fee.
This half hour session is not therapy as such but an opportunity for us to meet and find out a little more about each other.
I will ask you to outline the sort of issues you might want to bring and you will be able to ask any questions you might have.
There is no obligation involved and only a 10 fee.
I see many clients who describe themselves as being stressed, anxious or depressed.
Sometimes all three.
I will often do a reality check with them to find out.
What's been going on - not just in the last month but the last few years?
For instance if someone close to you died recently and you still feel sad about it you might not be depressed, you might just still be grieving.
Many people underestimate the impact of loss and change on their ability to function normally.
This is especially true if they come from a family that encourages a stoic, stiff upper lip approach to emotional distress.
Sometimes all three.
I will often do a reality check with them to find out.
What's been going on - not just in the last month but the last few years?
For instance if someone close to you died recently and you still feel sad about it you might not be depressed, you might just still be grieving.
Many people underestimate the impact of loss and change on their ability to function normally.
This is especially true if they come from a family that encourages a stoic, stiff upper lip approach to emotional distress.
Loss comes in many guises.
Most obviously when someone dies.
Bereavement brings grief.
And grieving is a process that moves through a kaleidoscope of feelings - anger, denial, sadness, acceptance - sometimes all at the same time.
Something similar happens when intimate relationships end.
Whether the ending is mutual or imposed the same feelings of loss will be around.
Even if the main feeling is relief at having got out of a bad situation there is likely to be a sadness at having to give up on the hope of what might have been.
Most obviously when someone dies.
Bereavement brings grief.
And grieving is a process that moves through a kaleidoscope of feelings - anger, denial, sadness, acceptance - sometimes all at the same time.
Something similar happens when intimate relationships end.
Whether the ending is mutual or imposed the same feelings of loss will be around.
Even if the main feeling is relief at having got out of a bad situation there is likely to be a sadness at having to give up on the hope of what might have been.
I have no magic tips for longevity.
For a start, who's to say how long is long-term?
Twelve years and still going is my current record! Feels like a long time to me and I can feel like a beginner compared to friends who recently celebrated their ruby anniversary.
I see it more as an existential question around what is enough.
Happiness, passion and the like are transient states our culture can be inclined to over-value.
If you want relationships to last I think you have to look at unromantic notions like acceptance, compromise, respect and consideration.
For a start, who's to say how long is long-term?
Twelve years and still going is my current record! Feels like a long time to me and I can feel like a beginner compared to friends who recently celebrated their ruby anniversary.
I see it more as an existential question around what is enough.
Happiness, passion and the like are transient states our culture can be inclined to over-value.
If you want relationships to last I think you have to look at unromantic notions like acceptance, compromise, respect and consideration.
And I wholeheartedly agree.
Clients will often say "What's the point in being angry!" and I'll say "What's the point in not?" and then quote Johnny Rotten.
Anger is not a 'negative' emotion, it's a response to something happening that you don't want to happen; the energy of protest.
If we didn't get angry nothing would ever change.
And it is an energy, so not an abstract concept or just a thought process.
It's a visceral experience that begins in the body as a movement towards something.
That energy needs to go somewhere.
Clients will often say "What's the point in being angry!" and I'll say "What's the point in not?" and then quote Johnny Rotten.
Anger is not a 'negative' emotion, it's a response to something happening that you don't want to happen; the energy of protest.
If we didn't get angry nothing would ever change.
And it is an energy, so not an abstract concept or just a thought process.
It's a visceral experience that begins in the body as a movement towards something.
That energy needs to go somewhere.
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